We had a fun Christmas. Everyone enjoyed the time together, the boys got lots of toys, and they really seem to get what Christmas is all about.
I, on the other hand, am an ungraceful goober. If you can believe it, I actually had to go to the emergency room on Christmas. Setting up the cooker on the back porch to cook some greens, I decided tripping on the back steps and trying to rip my big toe off to be a little way to add excitement to the day. Everyone up at Centennial was great, they fixed me up and got us out the door in under 2 hours.
We made it back in time for Christmas lunch, for which a big thanks go out to Grandma and PaPa for taking over. They took on the boys and finished up our lunch. I think the kids were so wrapped up with all the new goodies they hardly noticed we left.
It was super fun, though. Santa brought Gray his first real bike. Tracy got a Rocky the Robot Truck and a Mickey's Magic Choo-Choo. Of course beyond Santa they made out with tons of other stuff... You know they also have a PaPa, which by any measure is at least as good as Santa. So with PaPa and Grandma and the stuff we got them they made out like bandits.
What really makes it fun is being with people you love. We got together and enjoyed each other's company and had a good day. Next weekend we do it again with more family, and that will be fun, too. Being able to enjoy every moment you can have together is really the best part of the holidays; may just be the best part of every day.
Friday, December 25, 2009
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
What Matters
I have been hearing this little saying more and more for the last couple of years- "Perception is reality." In fact, my last blog post I spoke of an incident at work where I was falsely accused of something. When it was all being tried out at the time of the alleged incident, I tried to explain what I saw was happening and how all of this stuff was completely untrue. I was flatly quoted, by a person in very high position, "well, this is what this person feels happened, and you know perception is reality." My reality was summarily dismissed and a lunatic's perception ruled the day.
Not to bring that up as re-hash, although to be frank I'm not quite over it, it seems to be just another symptom of a larger issue. While I gave up reading the New York Times some time ago, I ran across this opinion piece when scanning a news feed I have set up. http://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/20/opinion/20rich.html
You're reading this, so you can read that. I'll not go over the whole thing in boring detail, but this piece hit home with me. I don't think the Tiger Woods thing or any of the other stuff have really redefined us culturally. I do think we have redefined ourselves culturally, however.
This culture we live in seems to be defined by what we perceive. Moreover, what we perceive are the things we wish to be rather than the things that are. I'm not terribly sure where this comes from; is it because idealists have aged and come to power, and while those idealists now realize life is less than ideal, they can't cope with the idea so they ask us to live a falsified existence to mask reality? Is it that we prefer fantasy to reality? Maybe we've just gotten dumb. I don't know.
It's a strange role reversal. In the Wizard of Oz, one cautionary part of the tale tells us we should look out for those that would prove devious. Today we don't seem to do that, we actually strive to be the man behind the curtain. We want to not be payed attention to, only letting others see our characters, not our character.
Back in the 1990's there was a term commonly used by my peers. People my age would often say they were "just keepin' it real'. To be honest I hated that phrase, I still do; but I get the meaning behind it. I guess coming of age during that time, middle school, high school, and college, I took that to heart. Perception was nothing, really get down in the dirt with someone. Know who they are, what they're about, why they do what they do; only then can you really know a person.
So I guess it's cynical, but I just don't have a great deal of faith that anything anyone tells me is true. I don't see that anyone has any interest in anything but themselves anymore. I still need to get in and get in beside someone to build the kind of relationship that puts its faith in one another. The hard part is doing that in a time that seems to devalue reality in favor of making itself look better than it really is.
My challenge to you, the faithful few that read this, is to 'get real' with someone. Sure, I hate that term, but it's the best I can do. Maybe this is idealistic as well, but if a few of us go somewhere uncomfortable, confide in someone, act as ourselves to someone, show someone our personality warts-and-all, tell someone the truth instead of what they want to hear; maybe we can start making a difference. Maybe we can start taking our culture away from perception and start yanking some guys out from behind the curtains.
Just a thought.
-Andy
Not to bring that up as re-hash, although to be frank I'm not quite over it, it seems to be just another symptom of a larger issue. While I gave up reading the New York Times some time ago, I ran across this opinion piece when scanning a news feed I have set up. http://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/20/opinion/20rich.html
You're reading this, so you can read that. I'll not go over the whole thing in boring detail, but this piece hit home with me. I don't think the Tiger Woods thing or any of the other stuff have really redefined us culturally. I do think we have redefined ourselves culturally, however.
This culture we live in seems to be defined by what we perceive. Moreover, what we perceive are the things we wish to be rather than the things that are. I'm not terribly sure where this comes from; is it because idealists have aged and come to power, and while those idealists now realize life is less than ideal, they can't cope with the idea so they ask us to live a falsified existence to mask reality? Is it that we prefer fantasy to reality? Maybe we've just gotten dumb. I don't know.
It's a strange role reversal. In the Wizard of Oz, one cautionary part of the tale tells us we should look out for those that would prove devious. Today we don't seem to do that, we actually strive to be the man behind the curtain. We want to not be payed attention to, only letting others see our characters, not our character.
Back in the 1990's there was a term commonly used by my peers. People my age would often say they were "just keepin' it real'. To be honest I hated that phrase, I still do; but I get the meaning behind it. I guess coming of age during that time, middle school, high school, and college, I took that to heart. Perception was nothing, really get down in the dirt with someone. Know who they are, what they're about, why they do what they do; only then can you really know a person.
So I guess it's cynical, but I just don't have a great deal of faith that anything anyone tells me is true. I don't see that anyone has any interest in anything but themselves anymore. I still need to get in and get in beside someone to build the kind of relationship that puts its faith in one another. The hard part is doing that in a time that seems to devalue reality in favor of making itself look better than it really is.
My challenge to you, the faithful few that read this, is to 'get real' with someone. Sure, I hate that term, but it's the best I can do. Maybe this is idealistic as well, but if a few of us go somewhere uncomfortable, confide in someone, act as ourselves to someone, show someone our personality warts-and-all, tell someone the truth instead of what they want to hear; maybe we can start making a difference. Maybe we can start taking our culture away from perception and start yanking some guys out from behind the curtains.
Just a thought.
-Andy
Saturday, December 12, 2009
The Biggest Lesson
This has been an pretty interesting year. For me, it has surely been one full of mixed blessings and emotions.
To start out, it really started at the end of last year. Getting to see Shelly finish her course work, ultimately graduating with a B.A. in the spring of this year is one of the highlights not just of the year, but really our life together. We made a conscious decision that one of us would graduate from college before we were married. I was closer to finishing, so that was me. It was also understood that the other would finish school. It took a little longer than planned, there might have been a little surprise that put it behind schedule, but to see that goal achieved made me very proud. To see how hard she worked for it, the way the pride and ownership of her work increased through the process, and the self-confidence she gained, all taught her that the faith we all had in her was not without reason. It was a great moment that will last our lifetime.
On the other side of the coin, I finally took ownership of my health. I have been through a couple of surgeries, 170 pounds of weight loss since mid-January, lifting weights 3 to 4 times a week, and running somewhere on the order of 20 miles a week. This may not seem like a ton to a seasoned runner, but a year ago I got winded walking up stairs. I'm eating right, living right, and feeling strong. I'm in absolutely the best physical shape of my life.
Now with that comes the hard part. Two surgeries and all of the recovery involved in both, the mental stress of massive lifestyle changes, and stresses of layoffs and a reorganization at work. December - February I saw my retirement savings literally lose all of it's gains from the past five years and return to a level slightly below its principle. From mid-January to mid-March I was unable to eat any solid food, which was mentally and physically challenging. At the same time I was facing my next operation in June I was placed on administrative leave due to a false allegation at work. From June to November I remained on probation after being found guilty of what I was falsely accused of, only to be taken off probation without apology or acknowledgement of a mistake when the evidence the allegation was a lie was finally reviewed and could no longer be ignored. In the midst of so many good things I felt like my world was crumbling around me. I was physically challenged and my faith in people's ability to see and do the right thing was destroyed.
To see the boys grow has been so much fun. Gray growing and learning, Tracy potty-trained and starting pre-school, and both having lots of fun together. Gray's getting so smart, starting to recognize words on paper and writing his letters better everyday. It's so exciting to see just how much two little minds expand, how they so readily absorb information and grow intellectually.
Through all of it, the trials and triumphs, I hope I learned something. I shouldn't say I hope, I know I learned. More accurately I say I hope I remember and make the best application of all I learned. The greatest tragedy of life is not to recognize strengths and weaknesses, not learn from them, and not to become the best person you can with your own unique traits. So with that, tough and easy, smiles and tears, I take it all in and become a better person. A person keenly aware of other's needs, knowing that meeting needs doesn't mean making people happy; to meet needs I must meet my own need for happiness first. I guess that's the biggest lesson I learned this year.
To start out, it really started at the end of last year. Getting to see Shelly finish her course work, ultimately graduating with a B.A. in the spring of this year is one of the highlights not just of the year, but really our life together. We made a conscious decision that one of us would graduate from college before we were married. I was closer to finishing, so that was me. It was also understood that the other would finish school. It took a little longer than planned, there might have been a little surprise that put it behind schedule, but to see that goal achieved made me very proud. To see how hard she worked for it, the way the pride and ownership of her work increased through the process, and the self-confidence she gained, all taught her that the faith we all had in her was not without reason. It was a great moment that will last our lifetime.
On the other side of the coin, I finally took ownership of my health. I have been through a couple of surgeries, 170 pounds of weight loss since mid-January, lifting weights 3 to 4 times a week, and running somewhere on the order of 20 miles a week. This may not seem like a ton to a seasoned runner, but a year ago I got winded walking up stairs. I'm eating right, living right, and feeling strong. I'm in absolutely the best physical shape of my life.
Now with that comes the hard part. Two surgeries and all of the recovery involved in both, the mental stress of massive lifestyle changes, and stresses of layoffs and a reorganization at work. December - February I saw my retirement savings literally lose all of it's gains from the past five years and return to a level slightly below its principle. From mid-January to mid-March I was unable to eat any solid food, which was mentally and physically challenging. At the same time I was facing my next operation in June I was placed on administrative leave due to a false allegation at work. From June to November I remained on probation after being found guilty of what I was falsely accused of, only to be taken off probation without apology or acknowledgement of a mistake when the evidence the allegation was a lie was finally reviewed and could no longer be ignored. In the midst of so many good things I felt like my world was crumbling around me. I was physically challenged and my faith in people's ability to see and do the right thing was destroyed.
To see the boys grow has been so much fun. Gray growing and learning, Tracy potty-trained and starting pre-school, and both having lots of fun together. Gray's getting so smart, starting to recognize words on paper and writing his letters better everyday. It's so exciting to see just how much two little minds expand, how they so readily absorb information and grow intellectually.
Through all of it, the trials and triumphs, I hope I learned something. I shouldn't say I hope, I know I learned. More accurately I say I hope I remember and make the best application of all I learned. The greatest tragedy of life is not to recognize strengths and weaknesses, not learn from them, and not to become the best person you can with your own unique traits. So with that, tough and easy, smiles and tears, I take it all in and become a better person. A person keenly aware of other's needs, knowing that meeting needs doesn't mean making people happy; to meet needs I must meet my own need for happiness first. I guess that's the biggest lesson I learned this year.
Wednesday, December 02, 2009
An Overdue Project
I've been working on this project for what seems like forever. In July of 2008 I decided I was going to build a real-life, working, recording studio in my house. This first order of business, once I got it built, was going to be to record a handful of original tracks to give to family at Christmas. Somehow that has not happened yet.
I actually started remodeling the room that became my studio within a few days of Gray moving out of it and moving in with his brother (it was their choice, they wanted to do that before I even thought of the studio). While I was remodeling I also bought everything I needed to build a custom PC to act as my recording/mixing desk. Everything was progressing well thus far.
I got the remodel completed, the computer built, and all moved in to the new studio in late July or early August, which, if you know me and my projects around the house, is probably a record of some sort. I mean, if all truth be told, the table I refinished (which I originally intended to sell) and placed the new PC on took me somewhere around 6 months to complete. From there I started buying my interfaces and converters to start making the studio happen. By the time it was all said and done I had a working studio by mid-October of 2008. I was pretty happy with my progress.
Next, of course, the recording started. Up to that point I had recorded in studios several times, I knew the game. Problem was, I had never produced or engineered anything. Little did I know how little I knew about the recording process. Mid-December was upon me, I had one song laid down, one in progress, and everything sounded remarkably amateur. This was exasperating.
So I pressed on, Christmas came and passed without anything being in a good enough state for me to move forward with. That was alright though, I had some new toys acquired at Christmas,which were going to help me do a wider range of things in the studio. I promised myself that I would have the project finished for the next Christmas.
In February of 2009 I had surgery and was not able to do any recording for about a month. In March of 2009 I was surprised by the invitation to start up a new group, which became Tennessee Real Time. After putting recording down on the priority list to get Tennessee Real Time up and running, July was here and my right hand literally quit working. I was unable to pick up an instrument with my right hand, much less play it, for nearly a month. From there a string of gigs, followed by Tennessee Real Time recording sessions, and it's approaching November. Ten months of the year gone and very little recording of my own complete.
Now it's December, one year later, and I have not made nearly enough progress to feel as though I'll be getting those Cd's out for Christmas. I guess I'll be trying to figure out some other Christmas gifts again. Just as well, I doubt anyone wants to feel obligated to listen to any garbage I'd record anyhow.
I actually started remodeling the room that became my studio within a few days of Gray moving out of it and moving in with his brother (it was their choice, they wanted to do that before I even thought of the studio). While I was remodeling I also bought everything I needed to build a custom PC to act as my recording/mixing desk. Everything was progressing well thus far.
I got the remodel completed, the computer built, and all moved in to the new studio in late July or early August, which, if you know me and my projects around the house, is probably a record of some sort. I mean, if all truth be told, the table I refinished (which I originally intended to sell) and placed the new PC on took me somewhere around 6 months to complete. From there I started buying my interfaces and converters to start making the studio happen. By the time it was all said and done I had a working studio by mid-October of 2008. I was pretty happy with my progress.
Next, of course, the recording started. Up to that point I had recorded in studios several times, I knew the game. Problem was, I had never produced or engineered anything. Little did I know how little I knew about the recording process. Mid-December was upon me, I had one song laid down, one in progress, and everything sounded remarkably amateur. This was exasperating.
So I pressed on, Christmas came and passed without anything being in a good enough state for me to move forward with. That was alright though, I had some new toys acquired at Christmas,which were going to help me do a wider range of things in the studio. I promised myself that I would have the project finished for the next Christmas.
In February of 2009 I had surgery and was not able to do any recording for about a month. In March of 2009 I was surprised by the invitation to start up a new group, which became Tennessee Real Time. After putting recording down on the priority list to get Tennessee Real Time up and running, July was here and my right hand literally quit working. I was unable to pick up an instrument with my right hand, much less play it, for nearly a month. From there a string of gigs, followed by Tennessee Real Time recording sessions, and it's approaching November. Ten months of the year gone and very little recording of my own complete.
Now it's December, one year later, and I have not made nearly enough progress to feel as though I'll be getting those Cd's out for Christmas. I guess I'll be trying to figure out some other Christmas gifts again. Just as well, I doubt anyone wants to feel obligated to listen to any garbage I'd record anyhow.
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